Doctor Mama Wifey WHATEVER

We all have that feeling that sometimes, I’m sure, when everything is happening in your life and at the same time it’s nothing. Work, life, kids, husband, dog poops, kid poops, celebrations, classes, lessons, parties, dates, volunteer, laundry, organize, vacation, work. As an American culture that I live in we revolve around work a lot. Work dictates most of our lives. work dictates celebrations and when they can happen. when someone can be buried and put to rest sometimes, work dictates even when to have children. I get it money is important to a certain point to sustain ones self, but it is sadly what makes up a majority of our decisions. I want to to just live on a farm in the middle of nowhere (well maybe a few neighbors would be nice) with lots of acres, in a land that doesn’t kill everything I try to grow in the ground because the temperature is as hot as the surface of the fricken sun. I want to grow my own food. I want my children to go outside with me and pick their own vegetables. I want them to just play, walk, run, be bored sitting in the dirt. Why do we/I get the feeling of always having to run, run, run, keep going! Literally I need to do everything, and if I don’t I am a failure to myself and family. If I do do everything then I need to do more, but the catch is if I do do more I become nothing.